不想成熟 =（（

气！

气！

真的很气！

做么一天到晚都要怪我一个！

一天到晚怪我！

我

我

我

气！

真的很气！

为什么只从那件事你们一直到现在都怪我！

我在你们的眼里有这么失败吗？

我真的有这么令你们很难看吗？

我有男朋友有错吗？

做么要骂我像我做了一件很重的错误。。

我真不懂。。

为什么弄我真的很生气那个。。。

为什么要弄到我要顶嘴那个。。。

我对你们的任真的很有限。。。

以前到现在都是一样没有变！！！！！！

一点点要骂我。。。

不是我的错全部都指我一个！！

我真的任够了！

不想在任！！

知道为什么我很会顶嘴吗？

因为我在保护我自己。。

我没有错，你赖到我身上。。。我就会顶你！！

去和朋友游玩都有错！！！！！！

去玩吗又不是去做坏事！

 夜回，又不是到12点晚上才回。。

连7到8点都被讲迟回。。

气！

昨天，又不是我的错！

为什么要骂我！

天天要我让他。。。将谁会让我叻？鬼啊？

还跟又不是我的错为什么要让他叻？

要我体谅他的性格，将谁会体谅我的性格呢？

每一次都让。。这一次。。。我不行了！

在外面我给别人欺负了的要命。。

我任！！

因为我知道他们是陌生人不懂得我的性格！

我任！！

我给别人陷害了我！

我任！！

我任！！

而你们是我的自己的家人。。

我真的不可以任。。。

我能任的我就任。。。

我不能任的我一定会顶！

顶到我满意维持！

别人看小我，我没关系。。

而如果我自己的家人看小我。。

我一定会顶不顺！

我会气！

我会骂！

我会顶！

我会讨厌！

我会很在意！

这就是我我从初一开始我已经是这个样子了！

我一点都没变！

我还是我自己！

我慢慢懂了事。。

但我还是变幼稚！

因为我不想快快长大及成熟。。

我不想！

因为我知道如果我变成熟了我一定要会照顾我自己

什么东西都要我让一让。。。

什么东西都要自己做！

什么东西都要自己解决！

我不想快快长大！

我不想快快懂事!

因为越我长大越我会失去你们！

对不起如果每次要让你们操心我。。

我不是不懂而我懂但我办幼稚不懂你们的意思！

我喜欢办不知道因为我故意！

我故意气你们！

我很自私吧。。

对不起爸妈气到你们这样。。

我懂你们的意思。。。

我知道你们想我好好便一个人。。

好好做一件事，不要让别人看小你。。

不要做事这么失败。。

好好嫁一个好老公。。。

最重要以后好好对待你自己的爸妈及兄弟姐妹。。。

但我还跟希望你们尊重我的决定~

useless ME =(

........................................................................................................

making somene worry bout ME...

feel sad~

dun know what did i made then make him so worry bout me....!

goshhhhh~~

feel like im was useless...

always make my love wory bout ME!

hmmppp~~~

what can i do??

can u told ME?

haizzzZz~~ =(((

again.............!!!!!!

my daddy~~

worry me juga......!!

he want go to far far place work bout worry me at home will making trouble..

y??

dun know laaa~~

just 1 word can decribe me....

im 'USELESS'~

always make people around me worry bout ME!

#@$%&*@#$%*!@#$^**$@#!%&*#$

i LOVE this arT~ (tattoo)

love it so much~~

but i cant do.......................!

y ?

because somebody will say.......

"bgs2 badan bersih mau kac kotor~~~"

hmmmpppp~

logik juga bha.............

tp kan,

sa....................................(gagap)

biarlah.....

hahahah =)

i just can ~

 put it as minat this art =)

^&^

-dOnG2-

i NEED u B~~~

last night is the night that i miss my B~

MISSING HIM SO MUCH~

..................................................................................................

AFTER finish teaching and done all of my work then i xmx my B say i miss him..

then..

im writing...

(concentrated)

then,

i press,press.press........

suddenly,

my gosh~~

somebody calling...

it would be my B~

then i answer the phone call...

i say : hello..my B~~

The guys is quited then he talk in chinese...

[ in my mind ]

"my gosh...whoose this guys??"

(mad) =~=

then the guys say : hey,u dint remember me? im alex...

i say : huh???alex???which one alex yarr~~~ i know many alex...which one yar??

alex say : im bha alex kong.

i say : (blurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr) who ah???

then he quited,im thinking (blurrrrrrrrrrrrrrr)

then,suddenly i remember................

i say : oh  i say the one who is call me every time right?(its a long time story 2009 b4 i knew my bf)

alex say : yah.

then we chit chat so many things...

asking this and that~~~~

then,

suddenly my B coll........(in a call waiting)

then i told him that my bf calling i need to talk with him...

then he say : BYE!!!!!!

then i reply : BYE!!!!!!!!!!

(sending a message plz coll me to my B)

(SENDING.............)

im waiting for his coll.....

then we talk...................!

then we fight/////////////////////

gosh~~

again.............!

then i know that he is jealous ~~

then i say im sorry didst i make u jealous?/

i dint mean it...

i taught u using other number to col me then i answer it..

im sorry...

in the same times im happy because he is jealous..

know y ?

because when he jealous mean than he is care bout me...he don't want anybody to disturb me...

hahahhahahhahahahah =))

but sometimes i need him to grow up..

don't think too much...

and trust that im love u truly fully in my heart...=)

 

" ONLY LOVE U B "

[ U ARE THE ONE THAT I HAVE LOVE SO MUCH ]

I NEED U~

I MISS U~

I LOVE U~

" MY B -CRISTER- "

*hugs & kisses*

-DEAR dong2-

                                            

*NO FIGHT*

[ 26 JULY 2010 ]

TODAY going to interview...

( good news )

i find the school by myself~

 ( bad news )

still need to wait for their decision =(  hmmppp~~

then after that i go to my B home..

rest~~

so HOT outside there~

my god~

then after that i planned going to eat at marrybrown..

order the different meal combo 8 & 12 ~

heheheXx~

then kan pya fast my B eat~

my god...mcm superman...hahha =)

hungry bha he~~

then kan  i still nt yt finish bha my lunch..

then kan i saw a girl bha so beautiful bha the girl than me..

really beautiful~

she eyes,nose....

beatiful bha..

then kan i say B nah tuhh chicks cantik...cpt pilih...pya cantik tuh B..

then he looks at me and say hmmppp~~ [ NO FIGHT ]

then i looks at he at smile...^____^

huh?

i say : pya cantik tuh ko x mo ko biar btl nea..

B say : NO fight la dear~~ (serius lg muka dia tuh)

i say : no fight pa mksd dia tuh??cuba jelaskan~~ *shy shy*

B say : pura2 lg bha...

then i laugh~~

somebody see us~

bt i keeping laughing.. and laugh.....hahahh =)

so sweet~~

im happy hear that..

sa x slh dengar bha kan B??

hahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahaahahhahahaahahhahaa =))

- NO FIGHT -

FRENCH FRIES =)

[25th JULY 2010 ]

TODAY,im going out with my B~

WE go to lunch~

shopping for cd?

bt didnt find the syok movie~

boOm!

i want go to KFC..

bt we went tO MarryBrown~

know y?

bcause we want to try eat there~

isnt delicious or not~

BooM!!

I meet alexander at there..

woww~

he is cool..

long time no c still cool~

hahah..

never taught can meet him over there..

a short topic but its cool..

miss the moment when we chitchat at school..

hahah =)

then we go eat.

wow~

nice la the salad..

i love it ^^

then, he finish his lunch then he eat my french fries..

then kan.....

i syok2 eat bha tuhhh~

then he take the french fries and start making a joke with the french fries..

hahahahaha~~

know what he do?

he do french fries teeth~

wakakakakak~~

like a mr potatoes cartoon...

never stop laughing on that...

its funny...

haaahahah =))

- a happy day with my love B -

^^

movie days =)

21 JULY 2010

[ going out with my B ]

TODAY we going to c moviE..

know what movie ?

my god~

[ its Ong Bak 3 ]

so GELI this movie~~

a lot of blood flow...

very scary..........!! *~*

then i watch kan..

aiksss nahh~~

syok juga TUHHH...

banyak aksi...

huhuhuhu =)

huh~

pya sejuk lg 2 CINEMA mo jadi ais da sa...!

hahaha =)

then somebody say : popcorn habis??

i say : eh owwww~~ im sorry i love to eat~

kakakxXX~~

its a nice days ^^

love it ^&^

my last day working =)

[16th JULY 2010]

- My last day working at Tadika Putera Puteri -

my god~

y me sick on this day...

i should not eat the crackers last n8~

it make me sick~

actually,

i dont want go to teaching today..

but because of my last day..

then i decide to GO!

after than i just be strong and teach the kidz for the last...

then we take picture,

joking,

playing and dancing together~

gonna miss them so much~

thx 4 the kisses ,hugging and quotes my kids~

especially,

Lester ^^

really appreciated it!

I'LL remember all of it Lester when u grow up teacher will be ur darling...

hahahah =)

 

one day, im asking them teacher gonna leave u because of my private excuse..

then,

lester say : y teacher??

i say : because i have smthg to do and need to fix it..

lester say : y ? u cant leave us..

 i say : y?can u told me because of what?

lester say : because u are the good teacher that i ever had and u are beautiful..u cant leave us...

i say : oh! lester....lets come teacher give u a kiss...then i kiss him...(mmmuuaaakkssss~)

lester say : yerrr...teacher kiss me then he (shy)

i say : dont like that bha lester...hehe thank u for saying that lester..really appreciated it! ^^

thx for all~

and i gonna miss this moment..

especially the moment i with my kidz~`

miss u all~~

- Teacher Doris -

its make ME wake up~~

omg!! 

cant believe that i stand for this reality...

this make me feel hurt so much..

i trust her y she do like this to me..

she not stand with me...

she stand for herself...!

i feel like what the world so complicated to understand this human been...

i feel so dissapointed with her attitude to me...

thinking that she done something for me was hurt me so much..

she is selfish...! 

hate it...!

really hate it so much...!!!!!!!!!

i never taught she will talk like that because i knew that she will stand with me....

i knew it....

she will stand with me..

i really knew it and im confident with her...

but~~

the truth is....

she not stand with me...

n i told u i really dissapointed with u...

really...

damn dissapointed with u this attitude...

u are selfish!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

so selfish with me!!!!

u are not standing beside ME!!

arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh~~

u hurt me...

u hurt me so much~~ =((

my god~~

cant believe this things will happen with me...!

and now..

i realize,

i should not trust her full on my heart~

everything will changed..

so,

this make me wake up~

wake up~

wake up~

wake up~

 and now....

i just can close my one eyes and let it be~~~

just let it be~~